I kept thinking 'one day I will write this book’ but when the time is right I will know, turns out last year I got a clear sign that the time was right. I awoke from a terrible nightmare but as I've studied dreams and the metaphoric mind I wrote this dream down which led me to writing about other traumatic experiences I had been through.
I was also working on my fear of public speaking which then led me to a meditation which was profound I had a clear message within this meditation that I must start writing this book as it would help a lot of people.
This message came to me last year which was around late summertime 2014. I have been making notes from then until now, and had a feeling I would start writing in the new year.
So here I am in January 2015 a fresh year...so no more excuses, I am doing it I am sharing my world with you and if my words help just one person then I have done what I set out to do.
I have been working on myself using FasterEFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). For almost 3 years to date, I started slow to say the least, I tapped on whatever was there but I was not consistent...it most certainly helped me at the time but I still felt lost, empty like something was missing inside of me. I was about to find out what that was, I asked the universe please help me I want to feel better. The universe answered.
I was on the FasterEFT Facebook group when I saw a message from a practitioner named Jamie asking does anyone feel like partying, being a bit of a party girl back then in 2012 I replied saying "yes I'm up for it where do you live?" he replied "Northampton" I checked on google maps & realised it was two and half hours drive from me so we chatted briefly and said maybe next time.
It was a year later before we chatted again I had done my best to fill in the void I felt in 2012, I traveled, I drank and partied, I always kept my diet clean and super healthy, kept up with my yoga regime regular exercise at the gym, my reiki healing I practiced on myself regular helped as did my weekly massage appointment, (I will note I had my own practice which specialised in all forms of massage, reiki and holistic healing), but nothing was filling that void.
Jamie & I happened to get chatting again on Facebook in 2013 and decided to Skype...we had similar ideas about business and our own healing and we decided to meet in person, it was quite bizarre but felt like something was drawing us together...it was a feeling that I have felt before a inner knowing that we could really help each other.
August the the 8th 2013 the day I met Jamie in person. I will never forgot travelling down to Northampton as I'm based in the north to his south, I was very nervous but it was more excitement like something good was about to happen. I remember he was late because he had fell asleep and also he was meeting me at a service station on the M1 and he had gone to the north side instead of the South (he was very scatter brain back then and this was a normal occurrence). Anyway we arrived at his shared house and I felt comfortable right away as we talked ate and drank some wine relaxed and had a laugh we was getting to know each other as the next day was to be our first tapping session.
I was feeling nervous and not confident enough to tap on Jamie so he decided to tap on me, I was not a heavy smoker but I had smoked on & off since I was 13...I wanted to quit for a while and had success then started again etccc.
That first session in Jamie's front room was long, exhausting and after a few rounds of tapping as with all smokers I've worked with the subject changed because the root cause it's never what you think it is. The reasons for smoking for me soon turned out to be issues I had with my family (who I love dearly) but I had some major issues and was unaware of most, that's a whole other story in itself!!...but one of my distraction techniques...symptom...stress relievers whatever you want to call it was smoking.
We tapped on several things and for most of the session I felt dizzy and faint and sick, oh my goodness the sickness was horrendous at one point I felt like I was going to pass out..but just when you feel like it can't get any worse something shifts and clears. Afterwards I felt so much better. I had a feeling of inner peace rather just a taste of peace I had not experienced before, I felt lighter and happier, my smoking was not cured...not yet, but I knew something big had happened that day..it was the start of a journey, a journey within myself that deep dark place I had not dared to go. There seemed like there was a flicker of light and I wanted to find out more and wanted another taste of this inner peace I felt without the aid of drugs drink or cigarettes.
I started tapping on myself at every opportunity on anything negative that I felt and had opened the floodgates.
I wanted to let go of everything that was not serving anymore, sometimes I would wake from a nightmare and be tapping and crying for hours..with the help of my friend Jamie who was always there on the other end of the phone when I called for help and were tapping on each other and clearing stuff up at a rapid speed.
I was always processing something, crying or screaming or being sick I did not know before I started this journey that I had so much pain and suffering I had not dealt with I was quite oblivious to it and had done a great job at suppressing it, so good in fact that if you had asked anyone I knew I'm sure they would described me as a happy, confident, carefree person, that's what I truly had convinced myself to believe too.
I was in for the ride of my life when I decided to quit smoking that day and had my first in depth session with Jamie (I had been tapping on myself with success but never had I allowed myself to go that deep) and as I now know that was to be the start of something amazing.
P.s. I have been smoke free for 15 months
Author: Victoria Cottam